Calling in Sick

Where's the instant win spot?I have the plague. I’m not sure where I inhaled it, but it’s burrowed deep into the tissues of my lungs and inspires a cacophonous hack anytime I think too ardently about the sea, turn nine degrees leftward, read the word “crème fraiche” or openly anticipate any given Wednesday. This is to say that I cough persistently, strenuously and with random provocation. After two weeks of this phlegm-glazed madness I finally made the co-pay and sought professional help.